The following footage was allegedly shot by a plumber in the sewers of North Carolina. Several biologists have weighed in on the debate and believe--to our bittersweet joy--that the creature is NOT a shoggoth. Instead, the current best guess is that it is a mass of annelid worms, probably Tubifex. Worms or not, this is not something we would ever want to meet in dark alley at night sans heavy weaponry. -LNN

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